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Hoo! Felt good to watch a full day of football again, didn’t it? Unless you were FSU, I guess, or the Big 12. Yeah, you too, Texas Tech. You don’t get credit for a 2 point win over an FCS school with thirteen wins to its name. We better not be having this talk again in two weeks, but I suspect we will.
I’m gonna be honest with everyone: we looked about as rusty as those teams that played last week but clearly had not been practicing. Those six 0-fers are off to a bad start, but the good news is there’s plenty of season left. For now. Shout out to the one entrant with a perfect score: Your friend Lee who has no idea what he’s doing. My friend Lee is currently stationed in Germany and does not have much opportunity to watch a lot of college football, much less his beloved Texas A&M Aggies. But here he is, doing better than literally all of us, at least some of which, I presume, are actually watching. (Editor’s note: Lee is now stationed in Eswatini, leaving him with even less opportunity to watch college football. If that name doesn’t sound familiar, it’s because it used to be called Swaziland.)
Gotta say, I was real excited about getting past week one and putting the next week’s set of picks together..... and then I actually looked at the schedule.
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That’s two of this week’s most interesting matchups off the table. Not ideal! I can’t believe I’m actually saying this, but man, we really need the SEC to get going. This might be the most dire selection in the six years I’ve been doing these picks. So, uh, yeah, here’s what we got. Good luck, and let’s look forward to a better slate next week.
Houston Cougars @ Baylor Bears (-4)
For years now, convention has been to plan your football schedules years, maybe even a decade or so, in advance. There are only so many non-conference spots available! Act now or miss out! But here we have in front of you all a game that came into existence just this past Saturday. From the ashes of games that were not to be — Houston was planning on playing Memphis on Friday, and Baylor was set to host Louisiana Tech — arises the long awaited reunion of these former Southwest Conference foes. Seriously, haven’t met since the conference’s last year in 1995. Remember 1995? Northwestern won the Big Ten despite losing to Miami (Ohio), FSU was in the middle of its decade of domination over the ACC, a lot of schools were still called the “Indians”.... on second thought, let’s not remember 1995.
Pick: Baylor
Central Florida Golden Knights (-7.5) @ Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets
The fighting Geoff Collins’s have returned victorious from a season opening victory in Florida.... and they appear to have picked up a stowaway on the way back. They’re really loud and they keep going on about some national championship and how any school who won’t schedule them are cowards. They do know Georgia Tech willingly scheduled a home-and-home with them, right? Bent over backwards to accommodate them and everything even in a crazy year like this. Ahh, well, that’s fine; I’m sure they’re gracious guests who would most certainly return the favor.
Pick: Georgia Tech
SMU Mustangs (-14) @ North Texas Mean Green
It’s a battle for Metroplex supremacy! With TCU.... uh, not doing so hot right now, and SMU in possession of the Iron Skillet after defeating the Horned Frogs last year, this showdown with the Mean Green will determine who holds the title of DFW’s football team. That’s right, “DFW’s football team” could be in..... Denton. That’d be weird. Almost as weird if they were in Frisco or Arlington or something. Anyway, former Texas QB Shane Buechele is — this is right? — yes, he’s back playing one last year for the Ponies, so at the very least folks in north Texas can see what a talented quarterback who’s actually being used properly looks like.
Pick: SMU
#17 Miami Hurricanes @ #18 Louisville Cardinals (-2.5)
“A Big East rivalry begins anew!” I excitedly type, before double checking and realizing the Hurricanes left the Big East a full year before Louisville joined. Oh well! This is the only game this weekend featuring two ranked teams, so the spotlight is all on you, Miami and Louisville! Miami, I especially know how you’ve done lately handling the spotlight. I know, I know, rebuilding and all that, but I mean.... *gestures toward Louisville* look at those guys. They’re in the same spot you are, and they’re fine!
Pick: Louisville
Wake Forest Demon Deacons @ NC State Wolfpack (-2.5)
What’s this? Two tobacco road schools kicking off the last P5 game of the day?? That sound you just heard was Jim Swofford’s pants disintegrating. (Sorry, UTEP, but playing Abilene Christian gets you as much credit as the Big Ten suddenly deciding they will play football after all.) Are you going to get a highly anticipated matchup between two titans of the sport? No. Are you going to get a technically sound game? Also no. Are you going to get a game that between teams that appear to be closely matched, but holds the potential to go so far off the rails they disappear from view? Absolutely. This might be the closest we get to #ACCafterdark. Enjoy it.
Pick: Wake Forest
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