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Tuesday Muse-day 11/19: Ugh

In which we talk punts, giving up, and our impending return to the earth from whence we came

NCAA Football: Virginia Tech at Georgia Tech Brett Davis-USA TODAY Sports

Is it 2020 yet.

Game Recap in Three Sentences

The offense had its worst game of the season, gaining just 134 yards and scoring 0 points.

The defense was also basically nonexistent, allowing the Hokies to rack up 461 total yards and 45 points.

The only thing Tech did well was punt: Pressley Harvin booted 9 punts for a stellar average of 48.2 yards per.

#404 Swag Champion of the Game

I don’t have the mental capacity to award this.

Uniform Rating

They’re fine. Burn them.

NCAA Football: Virginia Tech at Georgia Tech Brett Davis-USA TODAY Sports

ATLeast We Ain’t Them of the Week

Us. It’s us. We are them. **mental pretzel**.

I’d rather watch this for hours than whatever the heck we did Saturday

Above The Line of the Week

  • Pressley Harvin. Dude had his best game of the week, and honestly, he couldn’t have chosen a better one to be great in.
  • Literally any other sports team you root for.
  • The knowledge that it’ll all be over soon.

Stat of the Week

There’s a lot to choose from here but let’s go with 0. No, not the number of points we scored, but the number of scoring opportunities we had. For the uninitiated, a “scoring opportunity” is defined as a first down inside the opponent’s 40 yard line. Of our 13 drives, not a single one passed the VT 40. We passed midfield just twice overall. If you were wondering, the national average for number of scoring opportunities per game is 5.9 (shoutout to Akshay for the advanced stats report).

5 Star (7 Star, 5 Star) Developmental Program Haiku of the Week

I hate everything
Please someone make this all stop
Don’t make me watch more


Let’s start by rattling off some quick facts about this game:

This is our first shutout since 1997 and our first home shutout since 1957. Until Saturday, we had the 7th longest not-getting-shut-out streak in the country. Whoops.

Our first four drives were 3-and-outs.

In total, 8 of our 13 drives were 3-and-outs. 2 ended in failed 4th downs, and 2 ended in interceptions. The other one ended in 6 plays.

Tech’s average starting field position was the 18. VT’s was the 37.

Now let’s move into anecdotal observances:

I think that of Jordan Yate’s 7 incompletions, 5 of them were blatant drops. There was a stretch of like 3 straight that were just horrible. This was the point where my frustration boiled over.

Yates looked decent although for about 90% of his plays he was immediately having to scramble around with 4 VT defenders in his face. The OL seemed to have zero interest in protecting him.

Graham was much the same way. Both of his picks came as multiple defenders were coming to blow him up.

Let’s take a look at our proprietary Cardinal Sin Tracker™:

  • Losing record: check
  • Last in Division: check
  • Last in Conference: check
  • Lose to G5 school: check
  • Lose to FCS school: check
  • Get shutout by rival in a blowout: check
  • Get shutout by biggest rival in a blowout: <pending>

I dunno y’all; I feel like generally I’ve been pretty relaxed and laissez-faire about this season so far but I think this game broke me. I’m really at a loss for words.

2020 better be a big step forward. [Styx], Thursday night better be a big step forward.