Well, friends, we’ve reached the end once again. We laughed, we cried, we saw Alabama brutally dismember all who stood in the way of them winning another SEC championship. We watched every other SEC team lose four games! (Seriously, SEC - fantastic homage to the 2010 Big East.) And I guess there were a few championship games this weekend. But just because this last weekend was championship weekend doesn’t mean everyone could walk away feeling like a winner. Oh no, there are a few teams who are joining Tennessee as Champions of Life. They’ll have to decide for themselves who gets the trophy on which days, though.
The Duff’d It! Rankings will now enter their offseason hiatus, but don’t be sad, for the Duff will be with you, always. And if you’re glad to see them go, well, we hear Verne Lundquist might have some time in his schedule to write them next year.
Duff’d It! Rankings, Week 14
3. Florida. If you’re like me, you’re not a big fan of running. Rough on the joints. Tires you out quicker than biking. Terrible for building muscles. And if so, you, like me, have company in the Florida Gators! While we were all on our couches doing all this not running, Florida was doing the same against Alabama in the SEC championship. Don’t feel bad for the Gators - they could have let it be Kentucky instead. They forgot once the Tide has its sights set on you, you can’t hide, and you can’t run either.
2. Navy. Temple’s last (and previously only) conference championship came in 1967, when Pink Floyd released their first album. Turing on the AAC championship at any point would make you wonder if you had, uh, consumed any substances commonly associated with Pink Floyd’s music. Navy got rolled by 24 points by the Owls in a game they never led, eliminating any potential controversy concerning whether they or Western Michigan would take the G5 spot in the Cotton Bowl. But you know what? Navy took one for the team, and now we get to see some sweet-ass boat rowing in Dallas. Ain’t nothing that makes me more proud to be an American, Middies.
1. Baylor. Imagine if, eight weeks ago, someone had postulated we’d see undefeated Baylor and West Virginia play for the Big 12 championship on championship weekend. You’d probably think they were pretty dumb right about now! Good thing no one said that, since Baylor followed a 6-0 start with an 0-6 finish. Roon Zook himself did that with Illinois in 2011. He got fired for it! Fortunately for Jim Grobe, I don’t think he has to worry about that.
Bozo of the Week: Gus Johnson. Lots of people fall into that trap of thinking success on the football field equals redemption for bad things that have been done off of it. I thought you were too smart to fall for it, Gus, but you sure proved me wrong! That’ll teach me to have faith in humanity.
ACC Big 12 Conference Plays of the Week
Can it really be....? It is! The fabled rush zero play! That sound you’re hearing is Ted Roof furiously scribbling notes on this in hopes he can integrate it into the playbook by the bowl game.
Thought you could score on a blocked PAT returned for a safety, did ya, Gators? AIN’T NOBODY SCORED ON THE TIDE THAT DIDN’T PAY FOR IT, PAWWWWWWWWWL.
Employee of the Month of the Week
Dehaun Watson, QB, Clemson
To win your team a championship, you have to be a champion. Clemson was the hot pick to be upset by Virginia Tech in the ACC championship game, so when the Hokies wouldn’t go quietly, Deshaun Watson silenced the doubters, completing 23 of 34 passes for 288 yards and three touchdowns and adding 17 carries for 85 yards and another two touchdowns. Virginia Tech 35, Watson also 35. So when people ask why Watson is headed to New York challenging Lamar Jackson for the Heisman - yeah, stuff like this is why.