Okay, I don't have a whole bunch to say, obviously-
A lot of teams had really sensational games - Oregon, Auburn, and so forth - one or two schools wish they could have done their weekends over. But they couldn't couldn't keep from embarrassing themselves; as I'll tell you all, they're just not good enough; they're not coached good enough overall as a team, or maybe they actually are but they managed to completely faceplant on national television to their biggest rival who was a double digit underdog -
These teams have done a lousy job of maximising what I think they got here. They build huge leads in their group of five conferences but find a way to lose in Philadelphia (probably while giving up five turnovers) -
And you know, I don't really - I don't need to take any questions, you guys can read it, let me just get out of here -
Duff'd It! Rankings, week 10
5. Pittsburgh. PItt's hopes rested on this final play. It was all down to Pitt's man, and he was Blewitt, and then he blew it. Pitt's kicker's name is Blewitt, and he missed an easy field goal at the end of regulation that would have won Pitt the game. That's the joke.
4. Central Florida. It's been a nice run, Knights, but everyone has to lose their game in their new conference eventually. And unfortunately you drew the short straw and got UConn. It's not really *the* short straw, either: there are lot are straws in this pile - look, this one's Tulsa, this one's Tulane, and this one isn't even a straw, it's a toothpick - yep, that's SMU. So it could have been worse!
3. East Carolina. A return trip to the American Conference? The Duff'd It! Rankings are brimming with freedom this week. And speaking of freedom: East Carolina visited Philadelphia this weekend, birthplace of the Declaration of Independence, and commemorated the event by giving the ball independence from their possession five times. Temple took those five fumbles and 135 yards of offense (293 fewer than ECU) and turned them into a 20-10 victory. Brings a tear to your eye.
//puts a dollar in the jukebox to play "God bless the USA"
2. Georgia. "RUN THE DANG BALL, BOBO! ALSO, STOP THEM FROM RUNNING THE DANG BALL, BOBO! I CAN'T BELIEVE WE LOST TO THE WORST FLORIDA TEAM IN HALF A CENTURY FIRE MARK RICHT FIRE BOBO FIRE EVERYONE WE JUST GAVE UP 418 RUSHING YARDS TO WILL MUSCHAMP A MAN OFFENDED BY THE BASIC CONCEPT OF OFFENSE-"
Psst, hey, Gary Pinkel, what's your reaction to Georgia losing to Florida 38-20?
Gary Pinkel: "Lol."
1. Florida. "Uh, wait," you're saying, "but Florida won on Saturday." Sure, they were victorious in their football game. But does that really make them winners? This could have been the final nail in Will Muschamp's coffin at Florida! Instead it stands as his finest hour. That means another year of Big Dumb Will Muschamp football and the another year of testing Spencer Hall's sanity. In winning, Gators, you have lost, and there is no greater way to Duff It than that.
Honorable mention: Georgia State. Exempt from the Duff'd It! rankings last year on account of being new to FBS, Atlanta's college football team have continued their losing ways, following up an 0-12 campaign last year with one that is 1-8 so far in 2014. The Panthers lost to Appalachian State 44-0 Saturday in Boone, but in their defense, the field was snowy and icy, and we all know how well Atlanta handles snow and ice. The good news for GSU is they play Troy on Saturday, a team so bad they lost to FCS team Abilene Christian University.... which is the only schools the Panthers have beat this year. We've got a Duff'd It! Game of the Century coming up in the Georgia Dome this Saturday, y'all!
ACC Conference Plays of the Week
After a pregames scuffle, Maryland's captains refused to shake hands with Penn State's before the coin flip. The Terrapins were punished with an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty, but for Christian Hackenberg, it simply wasn't enough. He had to take matters into his own hands.
That Maryland staffer knew what he did. His punishment will ring though the halls of college football for years to come.
Meanwhile, in Oxford, Gus Malzahn is telling you to go, go, go!
Or banging out the drum solo to Metallica's "Blackened":
Or doing one of many other things the Internet has photoshopped him into doing in this GIF.
Co-Employees of the Month of the Week
Kelvin Taylor and Matt Jones, RBs, Florida
Everyone knows teamwork makes the dream work, and no dreams worked like Florida's did on Saturday thanks to the work of Florida's top two running backs. The duo worked in tandem to score four touchdowns and rack up 197 and 192 rushing yards, respectively, with Jones catching one of Florida's three completed passes on the day to bring their total yardage to 401.
So congratulations, Kelvin and Matt! Here is your imaginary EotMotW medal. We, uh, we only have one per week, so you'll have to share.... we weren't supposed to give the award to two people in a week. (Duff'd it!)