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Conference Re-A...What's Going On?

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Ahoy, FTRS crew!

Long and far away have I been, fighten the dread pirates known first as finals and then as "post-finals apathy!" But now I am back from my long portage, and boy has the mainland changed since I've been away! And now its time to put this tired sailing metaphor to bed and move on to the hotbutton issue of the day: Conference Re-A-Freaking-Lignment!

So it all started a few weeks ago when some fool out there in TV land decided it was a good idea to leak the numbers on the TV deal the Big12 made with Fox and SECSPN. This, naturally, piqued the interest of Clemson and FSU officials, who decided to get together in a secret room off in some secret land and look into the caldron of foretelling, aka internet message boards, to see what they should do next. Heeding the advice of user ITSUGARISWEAR_15 on tigerdroppings.com, a member of the FSU Board of Trustees decided to announce their intentions to beat Duke with a clawhammer and then get the hell out of the ACC. However, this action caught FSU up in the classic Washington scandal of screwing up by telling the truth and that BoT member was subsequently silenced. Since then, it has been a crazy swirl of foul and filth with a dash of salt, and no one knows what to make of anything. Some folks have them staying and some folks have them leaving, but one things for sure: It's people like you who are killing the party, Clemson and FSU. We just want to have a nice, peaceful offseason, but here you come with your constant need for attention waving your banner whining about how basketball gets preference over football in contract negotiations...IN A BASKETBALL LEAGUE. So quick your bellyaching, says this malcontent virtual mariner, and stop ruining college football for the rest of us. Thanks a bunch.