From The Rumble Seat: An SB Nation Community

Navigation: Jump to content areas:


Pro Quality. Fan Perspective.
Login-facebook
Around SBN: MLB Trade Rumors: Edwin Jackson to the White Sox, DC next?

10 Mascots more Dangerous than a Model A

From Bird:

I've been inspired after reading this article about mascots. I once read a Notre Dame blogger write about his account of GT's entrance including the Ramblin' Wreck storming on to the field. He said it was one of the most dangerous things he'd ever seen on a football field. First off, the Wreck never exceeds 10-15 miles per hour. It just looks fast. Secondly, you're in complete control of the vehicle, unlike many other mascots so...

I present to you 10 Mascots More Dangerous than the Ramblin' Wreck:

10. Costumed mascots with limited field of vision and short tempers.

9. Drunk driving mascots.

8. Birds of prey like Auburn's War Eagle. Hell throw that chicken at USC(e) in there, too. Do you really want to get your finger bit off by an eagle? Or eye gouged by a chicken with spurs?

7. Caged wild animals such as bears, tigers, lions, etc.. You know they've got some interesting insurance premiums for those bastards. Whenever I see a tiger on the field of play, I think about Naked Gun and the blooper reel including a tiger attack on an outfielder.

6. Texas Tech's Masked Rider. The horse has been killed or injured several times in game intros. The horse has also injured several people. Any other horse mascot should fall under #6 as well including UVA, Furman, Rutgers, FSU, USC, and any others I've forgotten.

5. Clemson, VT, and whoever else's cannons along with any other firearm wielding mascots. You only get two ear drums. Hearing merely fades, it doesn't grow back like a lizard's tail. This is a long term health hazard. An explosion hazard as well.

4. Dogs. Bulldogs, hound dogs, hot dogs. Get 'em off the field. We don't want rabies or tetanus.

3. Colorado's bison, Ralphie. Nothing safer than a WILD animal controlled by a bunch of rodeo clowns.

2. Oklahoma's Sooner Schooner. The 1993 crash is pretty terrifying to watch. The driver broke his leg in three places and the other passengers suffered bruises and lacerations.

1. Texas' Longhorn, Bevo. When I met Jim Kramer, he mentioned the only problem he had while on his college tour was Bevo the cow. Apparently, Bevo gored one of the trainers. Damn.

Anyone got any weird mascot stories out there?

0 recs  |  Comment 0 comments |

Story-email Email Printer Print

Around SB Nation

Comments

Display:

Comments For This Post Are Closed


User Tools

Welcome to FromTheRumbleSeat, a "bastion of capitalization and grammar skills."
Start posting about the Yellow Jackets »

Join SB Nation and dive into communities focused on all your favorite teams.

Connect_with_facebook

SBNation.com Recent Stories

Photo +14 updates

QB Jeremiah Masoli Headed To Ole Miss After Being Dismissed From Oregon

Photo

With Apologies To Randy Edsall, The Big East Remains Mostly Harmless

FILE -- This is an Oct. 18, 2008 file photo showing Connecticut corner back Jasper Howard (6) trying to get the crowd into the game during the fourth quarter of an NCAA college football game against Rutgers, in Piscataway, N.J.   Jasper Howard had his little sisters' names tatooed on his chest. His friends say it was a constant reminder of why he was at U Conn _ to provide his family with a better life than the one he had in Miami's Little Haiti. (AP Photo/Mel Evans, File) link

In Defense Of Big East Football

More from SBNation.com >


Managers

Heisman_small BirdGT

Marilyn_small EffinDane

Gravatar_small Winfield Featherston

License_plate_small Tedward09